Thursday, December 20, 2007

Developments in "Loogate"

We have all just received the following as a follow up to today's burglary drama:-

"Thank you for your understanding and patience today , after last nights burglary .

Can I also thank everyone who was involved in getting the office up and running again .

The Police have now left the Office and they have under arrest a man who was caught in the Office .

Entry was forced through a second floor window ( that was locked ) , accessed by a drainpipe. There were no lapses of security and this is not an incident we could have prevented.

There is some damage in and around the office and we are trying our best to get all offices back in working order .

Please contact me if you are missing , a Ladies black winter coat , a Ladies suit and a pair of Ladies dark trousers.

If you have lost or now have damaged personal property or have any other concerns, please contact me ."

So, to summarise, the burglar climbs up a drain pipe, clambers in through a second floor window, steals some women's clothing, and then goes for a quick snooze in the bogs before the police arrive.

This could only happen in Ipswich.

12 comments:

punka.... said...

I hoped you've claimed your clothes back though?

Patrick said...

How can they possibly say that there was "no breach of security" after a crossdressing narcoleptic version of Spiderman has spent the eveining roaming around the office at will?

punka.... said...

there's a film idea lucking ith there patrick! pitch it to the dragons!

coyote said...

is anyone missing a black ladies' thong? I found one in my living room last night under some boxes... not quite sure how it got there or whose it is...

Patrick said...

It is not mine, mambo.

I hope that helps narrow it down a bit, and leads to a successful reunion of lady and black thong in the near future.

coyote said...

quickly followed by a reseparation hopefully...

Patrick said...

All of this does raise serious questions of how this particular pair of lady's frillies contrived to find themselves in your flat, mambo.

I think we deserve answers.

Anonymous said...

I think he just bought a few pairs,
scattered them around his flat in hoping visters would beleive him to be somewhat of a stud. ;-)

coyote said...

dammit northy you saw right through my plan!!!

Patrick said...

That would appear to be the only truly credible theory at this stage, Northy.

Patrick said...

mambo, when you do that whole scattering pants around your flat thing, do you first sew name tags into them like "Scarlett Johansen" and "Angelina Jolie" and "Beyonce"?

coyote said...

well of course, but i don't use celeb names, that would be too obvious as a plant. it's gotta be more realistic names, like stephanie drayton, or trixie labouche or Cand A